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The Recipe for a Strong Team

Taylor Stauffer Leave a comment

The recipe for a productive, happy team isn’t complicated. Like actual food recipes, it’s all about working with real, authentic ingredients. No fake elements, no aggressive attitudes.

 

Toxic work cultures aren’t new but they all tend to operate the same way. A culture of ‘motivation by fear’ works, but only in the short term. If you want a team that is inspired, that sticks together and works well as a unit, you need do everything you can to avoid a toxic style and bring dignity to the table, instead.

 

Give praise as well as feedback

 

Have you ever noticed how often people speak up when it’s to complain about something but how they will speak up less often to offer praise for a job well done? If a team member feels appreciated and is actively told they’re doing something right, despite constructive feedback that might seek to improve their performance, they will be happier in their roles.

 

Even if they are not performing as you would like them to, from their point of view, they may be doing their best. A manager or leader who doesn’t recognize that will lose their confidence.

 

Use their strengths

 

A team member who feels their skills are being underutilized will never be happy. If, however, you are using their skills to the best of your ability, they not only feel more fulfilled but you are clearly demonstrating that you see them for what skills they have and what they can add to the team as a whole. It’s important for people to have that recognition, to know that those above see them for who they are and what they can accomplish.

 

Lead by example

 

This is basic: if you want people to behave a certain way or work a certain way, you have to do it too. Walk the walk, as the saying goes, instead of standing on a pulpit issuing orders. That also means that you need the skills to do the work too. You won’t gain respect of your team if they feel that you can’t do the job alongside them.

 

Akin to this is leading with authority. It’s difficult to lead a team if you don’t really understand what you’re doing. You need to come from a position of knowledge in order to get people to listen to and follow you. That said, you can’t know everything and being honest about what you don’t know is an opportunity for the team to see you as human, rather than an authority figure. That’s important for their own validation but also for you to be able to relate to one another.

 

Listen to your team

 

Do you want team members to step up with new ideas? Do you want them to offer suggestions and find new ways of working? You need to listen to them. This doesn’t mean that you have to do what they ask every time, but you have to at least take their opinions under consideration. Nothing will cause a group of people to stagnate faster than a management team that doesn’t care what they think.

 

This needs to happen as a group, but also on a one-on-one basis, so that your team always feels that they can speak to you about concerns they might have, whether they are personal or professional. Do you have a single mom who is struggling to manage her home and professional life? Let her work from home on a regular basis, so that she can gain some control.

 

Add a dash of dignity

 

While respect is earned, dignity is something everyone should receive, without having to qualify for it in any way. Treating people with dignity is a minimum requirement for all successful teams. This comes back to the notion of controlling people with fear, as a toxic work environment will do. This management method strips away people’s dignity because they don’t feel safe. The ability to make your team members feel safe at work is an essential step to building a superior, effective and efficient team.

 

You want your time to feel inspired, safe, valued and appreciated. From there, you’ve got what it takes to build a solid team that will help you grow a project, a business, or an entire industry!

How to Conquer Your Fear of Public Speaking in Just 6 Steps

Taylor Stauffer Leave a comment

In real estate, the mantra is: ‘location, location, location’. In public speaking? It’s ‘practice, practice, practice’.

 

Ask some actors and they’ll tell you that they never get over the stage fright, the butterflies that come before the cameras roll or the curtains part. One thing they will all tell you is that they beat back those fears with rehearsal. Not so that a piece will sound rehearsed as it comes out of their mouths but so that they know it backwards and forwards, inside and out.

 

Similarly for nervous public speaker, the comfort derived from a good level of preparation is the key to giving a good speech.

 

Here are six steps to help you get to the public speaking promised land!

 

Find the sweet spot on your material

 

Engaging an audience is half the battle: if you feel like they’re with you, that they’re listening, that they’re engaged, you’ll be more successful. So how can you ensure that they are with you? Make sure that there is a connection between what you want to talk about and what they are interested in. This is about knowing your audience and ensuring that your material is relevant to them. If you want to talk about the perils of entrepreneurship to a group of mental health workers, your sweet spot is going to be talking about stress, depression and other mental health issues, with anecdotes and stories that are specific to entrepreneurs.

 

Find a sweet title for your speech

 

Just like the first line of a novel, your speech title is what will spark interest… or not. Your audience will be drawn in by a great title and they will at least start out engaged. That interest factor applies to you too! If you’ve given the same speech twelve times, tweak it by changing up the title and a little of the speech. It’s important that what you’re saying feel fresh and interesting to you as well.

 

What should any speech include, aside from a great title?

 

Start with a story, if you can. The level of engagement that you will get will be higher and that will put you on a good footing to continue. If not a story, then ask the audience a question. Something that challenges them or makes them laugh. You want to capture their attention. Then what?

 

  • Point out the relevance of your speech to this particular audience, if it’s not already crystal clear. Your premise, or the ultimate point you want to make, should come right up front.

 

  • Give information that clearly demonstrates your expertise or knowledge in the subject matter. Without getting bogged down in too many stats, jargon or esoteric information, you can wow an audience and keep them engaged because you’re able to back up the premise you made earlier.

 

  • Opinions matter if you are a subject matter expert, so don’t be afraid to give them. You want to provide something to your audience that they can’t get by watching a series of YouTube videos!

 

Edit… and then edit some more

 

Write your speech out and then edit it. Give the speech in front of your dog, to hear it out loud. Then edit it. Give it to a camera so you can watch yourself and your various arm movements or nervous tics. Then edit it again. You want to have practiced enough to know the speech well but not so much as to sound like an over-rehearsed machine.

 

Keep your language simple and clear. Multisyllabic words may sound impressive on paper but if half your audience is asking SIRI what something means in the middle of your speech, you’ve lost them.

 

You want to see how fast you are speaking, what filler words you over use and whether or not you’re laughing inappropriately. It’s all a part of the overall image you’re going to project. When you feel like you’ve got the right image, you’ll feel more confident about giving the speech.

 

What are three known speech killers?

  1. People who blather instead of staying on point.
  2. People who use sarcasm.
  3. People who talk in platitudes and trite phrases. If you sound like a bumper sticker, you’re going to lose your audience!

 

Get some presence!

 

Walking on to a stage or up to a podium is your moment to really capture everyone. Even before you’ve said a word, you can lose them if you’re fidgeting or engaging in other nonverbal behavior that turns your audience off. Like what?

  • Not looking at your entire audience, no eye contact.
  • Staring at cue cards or at slides.
  • Talking quickly or mumbling. By practicing your speech, you can adopt a strong cadence that your audience will enjoy listening to.

 

What to do if you feel you’re losing your audience?

 

Be prepared with some humor. Without a doubt, humor is the ideal way to regain their attention and refocus it on you. Quotes, anecdotes, jokes about yourself… whatever you’re comfortable with.

 

If you want people to hear what you have to say but you’re nervous about saying it, it’s best if it feels as if you are having a conversation with them. If it feels to each audience member as if you’re speaking directly to them, you will have their attention. If you feel that way, you’ll be calmer, more collected and more effective in your speech. Good luck!

10 Things Mentally Strong Leaders Do

Taylor Stauffer Leave a comment

Really, it’s a bit of a misnomer to refer to ‘mentally strong leaders’. Most leaders, by definition, are mentally strong. But like the chicken and the egg argument, which came first? The leadership or the strength?

 

Most successful leaders started out with many of these strong traits in their back pockets, but their time in leadership roles has honed them so that they have become a real part of their personality.

 

1.Embrace change and challenges

 

A mentally strong person will not shy away from change or challenges in life and in business. In fact, they will invariably see adversity as an opportunity, not a negative. There is a willingness to act outside of their comfort zone, for a greater result.

 

2. Take (calculated) risks

 

Risk for the sake of it is not on the agenda for a mentally strong person, but a calculated risk that could result in a valuable result is something they will engage in. That’s because, at it’s foundation, a calculated risk is evaluated based on logic, not gut.

 

3. Willingness to fail

 

Intertwined with the willingness to take a risk is the willingness to fail. One comes with the other! Mentally strong people maintain a constant state of relative optimism. That is, while they’re not mired in negative thoughts of failure, but they aren’t blindly optimistic either. Instead, they live in a happy medium where they prefer to see the positive but are open to reality.

 

4. Celebrate others

 

As with any personality that leans towards a good dose of self-confidence, the mentally strong person will always and happily celebrate the successes of others. That’s because they understand the merit that comes with achieving things and a core belief is that we none of us succeed alone.

 

5. Think wisely

 

Time is a finite thing when you consider our mortality. Mentally strong people tend to be able to think ‘bigger picture’, remove the extraneous details that don’t matter or aren’t worth worrying about and keep focused. This is the best use of their time and energy.

 

6. Maintain core beliefs

 

Even in the face of opposition, a mentally strong person will stay true to their core beliefs. Not in a stubborn way: they are always open to being disproved by others and will modify their beliefs if convinced. But they will also not sway in their beliefs because of peer pressure or some vague nod to popularity. They’re comfortable in their way of thinking and will defend it, if necessary.

 

7. Focus on that which you can control

 

Too many of us spend a lot of time fussing about things that we can do nothing about. Mentally strong people will take stock of whatever they are dealing with and make cogent plans for managing the issue, rather than worrying about it.

 

8. Learn from, and make peace with, the past

 

Whenever a past decision turns out to not have the positive results expected, a mentally strong person won’t dwell on the result. Instead, they’ll review it, take responsibility for it, see what can be learned from the experience, and move on. Viewing failure as an opportunity to learn and grow is in their nature.

 

9. Spend time alone

 

There’s a great line in the 1995 movie: Sabrina. Fanny Ardant, playing an editor at Vogue France, says to the young and impressionable Sabrina: “You seem embarrassed by loneliness, by being alone. But it’s only a place to start.” It’s so true!

 

Whether to get a handle on their thoughts, work through a problem or simply relax, mentally strong people are comfortable spending time alone; indeed, they look forward to it.

 

10. Practice gratitude and kindness

 

Being grateful and kind are choices that we make. We can choose to be those things vis-a-vis other people and situations. A mentally strong person will practice gratitude and embody kindness whenever they can because they know that these two attitudes can help keep any problem they might have in proper perspective.

 

An effective way to be mindful and remain grounded in gratitude is to keep a gratitude journal. This ‘secret ingredient’ to happy, productive lives is one that mentally strong people are aware of and embrace.

 

What do you do to stay mentally strong? Would you add to this list?

7 Tips to Help You Command the Room

Taylor Stauffer Leave a comment

 

“Whenever you do a thing, act as if all the world were watching.” — Thomas Jefferson

 

Whether you’re at a networking event, or about to chair a board meeting with a slightly hostile majority, fear is your enemy if your goal is to command the room. Instead, do as Thomas Jefferson suggests: act as if all the world was watching. What would you want them to see?

 

True leaders make their presence felt without uttering a syllable. Instead, their gravitas is almost innate and no, it doesn’t come from their title. So how do you do it?

 

Be on time

 

Nothing makes a worse impression than the person who stumbles into a meeting or presentation late, disrupting the whole event. If you’re standing around making excuses for being late, you’re not coming from a position of strength. When you want to command a room, that’s not a great start. Instead, make a positive, strong entrance.

 

Walk tall

 

Perception is reality: if you walk in looking defeated, uninterested, bored or anything other than purposeful, that is how people will perceive you. Do not walk in with your head down, shoulders bowed, shuffling your feet. Body language says a lot to others, so stride into the room with purpose! How you carry yourself tells others whether you’re commanding or just being. Even if you don’t know where you’re going to sit just yet, you need to walk in like you own the place.

 

Acknowledge others

 

Say hello, shake a few hands, and look people in the eye! It’s all about charisma: looking like you belong even if that’s not exactly how you’re feeling in the moment. Whatever your misgivings are, you need to show others that you’re engaged by acknowledging them. Eye contact is a strong body language element that gives the other person a strong sense of your confidence. If you look anywhere but at the person you are speaking to, you look like you either don’t know what you’re talking about or you have no presence.

 

Sit up straight

 

Slouching is for teenagers! You need to sit tall and straight in your seat if you want to look commanding, even while seated. The point is to give the appearance of strength. Women are in particular prone to minimizing their presence: shoulders hunched, ankles crossed, almost hiding.

 

Where you sit matters too. If seating isn’t assigned, take these tips on board:

 

  • Tables: sit at the table, not in a background chair. If there is a seat for whoever is in charge, sit near but not next to them. In doing so, you’re giving yourself access to them and still leaving yourself open to connecting with others around the table.

 

  • Rows: don’t sit in the front row, but choose a chair near the front. Usually, a front row is reserved for speakers or honored guests, so you want to be near them and able to interact with them if the opportunity presents itself, without necessarily being among them. The point is to be able to engage with those around you and ensure that they see you as much as you see them. Setting yourself apart, as would be the case with the front row, creates an invisible barrier to that connection.

 

Keep to your intro

 

If you’re introducing yourself to others, use your practiced and polished intro speech. No extra details: just the meat. This isn’t a pitch, so make it short, sweet and memorable.

 

Project your voice

 

When speaking, unless it is a private conversation, make sure that you project your voice. Not to be obnoxious but to appear authoritative. So many people get quieter, or worse, mumble when in a group situation, but if you want to be seen as commanding the room, you have to take it! No one is going to hand it to you.

 

If you are speaking to a group, make sure to gesture with your arms, above the hip. Keeping your arms away from your body gives a sense of openness and strength while you speak. Keeping them unmoving at your sides, almost like a robot, gives the impression of fear or weakness.

 

Influence by being concise

 

People who have an opportunity to speak, whether at a meeting or a larger gathering, but then drag on about a variety of topics instead of staying on point are rarely people of influence. If anything, they develop a reputation for being unable to get to the point, and people start to ignore what they’re saying even before they’ve begun speaking. Don’t be that person!

 

Know when to remain silent too: “Well-timed silence is the most commanding expression.” ~Mark Helprin

 

If you’re not yet in a leading position in your organization, being able to command a room will get you noticed by those who can affect your role. It’s a skill that you need to practice to perfect.

 

 

So next time you find yourself in a meeting or getting ready for a presentation, remember these tips and remember that a great leader can lead a room without saying a word.

One Quality That Can Be Found in All Innovative Leaders

Taylor Stauffer Leave a comment

 

You might be thinking charisma, or speaking ability. Perhaps you think it’s about their communication style or their ability to delegate?

 

Wrong. The quality that you will find in virtually ALL leaders who are at the head of change and innovation around the world is a willingness to solve problems.

 

“Problem-solving leaders have one thing in common: a faith that there’s always a better way.”

– Gerald M. Weinberg

 

 

This is different from problem-solving ability. A lot of leaders have that too. What I’m referring to is a predisposition to want to solve problems over and above all other actions. To want to innovate and challenge the status quo. So much so that this type of leadership has been called ‘challenge-driven leadership’.

 

“Inside of every problem lies an opportunity.” – Robert Kiyosaki

 

So while some leaders are good human resources managers, some are not as gifted in that department. While some leaders are great communicators, some are less so. What one thing ALL good innovation leaders have in common is not just a willingness but, an overwhelming need to solve problems.

 

That focus on problems, rather than people, can lead to some tunnel vision when it comes to compassion, gratitude and understanding vis-à-vis employees and team members. It can also lead to a tendency to want to do everything themselves instead of delegating to others and trusting that they’ll get the job done.

 

But a seasoned leader will have a fair understanding of their personal strengths and weaknesses and will be able to compensate for it. How? By surrounding themselves with people who have the strengths they lack.

 

Who are the innovative leaders of today?

 

Look at the leaders you admire. The ones who are driving truly world-altering changes in business, technology, and politics. They don’t necessarily fit the template of what we would consider to be a ‘traditional leader’. Instead, they come from diverse backgrounds, cultures and knowledge bases.

 

A good example of challenge driven leadership? Elon Musk. He is breaking barriers and changing the way we think about everything from modern infrastructure to space travel. Talk to people who work closely with him and they’ll tell you that part of what’s amazing about his style of leadership is that his passion is catching. He is a workaholic and he does expect a lot from his teams but he also selects people who are likely to rise to the occasion.

 

Do problem-solving leaders attract followers?

 

By way of their passion for finding a unique solution to whatever problem they’re dealing with? Yes. That passion is contagious and their desire to make a difference is what propels them and others forward.

 

Again, referring to the extraordinary problem-oriented leadership of Elon Musk: “ The thing is no one, especially not Elon, is forcing you to work long hours. SpaceX just hires self-driven people who are extremely passionate about the mission. Long hours is just usually what it takes to get the job done, especially if you’re working with limited resources.” (Source)

 

Leaders whose dominant strength is solving problems know when to be front and center and when to step aside and let someone else take over. Their actions are always in service of innovation, rather than in window dressing.

 

Knowing that great innovation comes from seeing problems at different angles, think about what kind of leader you want to be, now and in the future. The leading edge of industry, technology and business won’t be found by sitting quietly and saying little.